Arc'nsow Eddy
Kevin Heaton

Theys a 74 Vic on'eice sad.
Theys a 71 C-tin onna wayest.
Theys a dam nas couch onna frunt poach,
do'ladie lef d'ouse inna mayess.

Innythang y'all knead, Ed keypse inda yarrd,
3 coondawgs anna Garseeya rodd.
Yew'zd chane sow anna Havealena hawg,
anna fur-tile Rode Eyelan Rayed.

Win da'more broak dan e dig upda grace,
gaught lade-off an hayad nuther key'd;
nuther yung'in thar ta slop atda troff,
rustie nells inna ol' Foljerz cayenne.

Theys a fan Layzee Bowie cheer inna bike,
anna fore will back inna shid.
Sum minsemeet pi anna bint crankeshyft,
anna ol' gooseddown fither bid.

Theys a yew'zd Frijid-ayr an sum ol' orinjburg,
sum baried pvc suer pap.
Iffin knee threw't aweigh y'uns doan't won't eat,
anna Crismus lats r uhp n ju-lie.

Arkansas Eddie

There is a 1974 Crown Victoria on the east side of the house. There is a 1971 Chevrolet Custom-10 pickup truck on the west. There is a very nice davenport on the front porch. His wife went shopping and left the house in disarray.

Anything you might need, Ed keeps in his yard, there are: three coonhounds, a Garcia fishing rod, a used chainsaw, a Javelina hog, and a Rhode Island Red hen that still lays eggs, and much more.

When his mower stopped running, Ed removed all the grass from his yard. He was laid-off from work and subsequently, he and his wife had another baby; another child in the house to feed. He also keeps used nails in an old Folgers coffee can.

There is a fine La-Z-Boy recliner in the backyard and a four-wheel motorcycle in the toolshed: some homemade mincemeat pie, a slightly used crankshaft, and an old fashioned featherbed.

There is a used Frigidaire refrigerator, some used orangeburg tubing, and some pvc sewer pipe that he borrowed. If Ed no longer has use for it, it's probably not worth having. His Christmas lights are displayed throughout the year.